Christian Polygamy

29 July

polygamy1I’m sure you’re puzzled by the title of my article but please bear with me as I explain. Today I was watching a marathon of the past season of Sister Wives. I know, I don’t know how I can watch it either, but in my defense I have taken breaks from watching their show. The complete disregard for how God designed marriage gets to me, still I find it funny at times. I guess I’m easily amused. 🙂

One the adventures the family had this season was visiting a Christian polygamous family in Missouri. You read that right, it was a Christian polygamous family. And to reassure you that I’m not pulling your leg I’ve provided some links below on the topic.

The Richard family is comprised of Nathaniel, his first wife Rebecca, second wife Christina, and nine children. They have no ties to the Mormon Church or even Fundamental Mormonism. Nathaniel and Rebecca were just a Christian couple who decided it was God’s will for them to become a polygamous family.

According to their story it all began when Nathaniel was sitting on the couch while Rebecca was making cookies wishing there was “another Rebecca” who could sit with him and snuggle when she worked in the kitchen. After a dream he had where he saw Christina (who attended the same church as the Richards) as his wife and looking through the “Old New Testament” he was able to convince her this was what God wanted for them.
After getting Rebecca on board with this nutty idea of taking on another wife he spoke to Christian and was able to get her on board as well. Apparently she had her own dream a few years ago about putting to bed children who weren’t her own.
As a side note, I’ve read over a few sites dedicated to the topic of Christian polygamy and learned that it’s sometimes called Christian Polygyny. Polygyny is a form of polygamy. Both are defined as follows:

Polygyny- (1) the state or practice of having more than one wife or female mate at a time
Polygamy –(1) Marriage in which a spouse of either sex may have more than one mate at the same time — compare polyandry, polygyny (2) the state of being polygamous

While it’s true that God tolerated the practice of a man having more than one wife for a time His perfect plan for marriage was always one man and one woman. This is made clear in the Garden of Eden when God created one wife for Adam, if He had desired him to have more than one wife wouldn’t he have created more than one?

One of my fears as a Mormon was that I would have to share my husband one day, either in this life or the next with one or more additional women. When the topic would come up most of my friends would say that if it was something God wanted them to do He would have to change their heart so they would accept it. One friend told me she hoped it was practiced in the next life because her husband wasn’t a member and had no plans of ever joining the church.

My friend, like the rest of us were taught that unless we marry in the temple and are sealed for time and all eternity to a worthy priesthood holder we won’t be permitted into the highest level of the Celestial Kingdom when we die. This is the level of heaven according to Mormonism where God dwells and is the level all Mormons are working toward.

My friend believed she needed to have a worthy Mormon priesthood holder by her side to escort her pass the gates of this level, and to the throne of God. And to do that she needed to be married to one in the next life if her own husband didn’t convert.

I haven’t spoken to her since I left the church but this one comment has stayed with me. How heartbreaking it must be to live like that very day of your life, believing that unless your admittance into God’s presence is not based on what Jesus did for you but on your husband’s worthiness to the doctrines of a false religion.

What a crazy world we live in where people who profess to be followers of Christ can be so deceived by Satan as to enter into relationships that go against His will. While others have such a distaste for the cross that they feel more must be required of them before they die so that they will live with God when they pass from this life into the next.

It makes me want to hold on to His word with both hands and dig into it daily, and to teach my children to do the same so we won’t be deceived.

In Christ,
Melissa Grimes (melissa@lifeafter.org)

References:

Facebook, Christian Polygamy

Christianpoly.org

Christianpolygamy.com

The Richards Passover Seder  

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16 Responses to “Christian Polygamy”

  1. Trevin September 6, 2016 at 3:17 am #

    I thought similar to you, until I read Jeremiah 31:32. In this verse the Lord declares his polygamy. Since God is a polygamist, and God can not sin, polygamy is not a sin. Since God is a polygamist, he who despises polygamy, despises God. Approve of God’s actions and do not despise them. For more information, visit http://www.biblepolygamy.com.

  2. Luis Marín October 12, 2016 at 9:52 pm #

    “Nathaniel and Rebecca were just a Christian couple who decided it was God’s will for them to become a polygamous family”. They decided it.
    Oh wait! The following paragraph reads, “he was able to convince her this was what God wanted for them.”
    And then the next: “After getting Rebecca on board with this nutty idea…”
    It is so clear.

  3. Albert March 6, 2017 at 2:29 am #

    Trevin’s use of Jeremiah is a classic example of taking a verse out of context and inserting one’s beliefs in scripture intended by the writers of the scriptures. Obviously the plural is always there since Israel is a mass of people in the same manner that the use of the “church as a bride” is also composed of many members but it always refers to a singular identity pertaining the relationship with Christ. It is not God and his many Israels and Christ with his brides.

    Why do people go this direction? It happens because it is natural subjective inclination of our hearts to fulfill our sensual desires and then insist that we are being led by God to fulfill these desires.. This same argument is now used for same-sex and other other type of marriage arrangements but is goes against to what was given to us in Genesis with Adam and Eve and confirmed by Christ as God’ plan for human marriages. The language used in the New Testament pertaining to marriage and families is always about the husband and the wife and the children not anything else.

    • Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:20 pm #

      Albert, You are wrong! Trevin only used one passage in Jeremiah, and it is not the strongest passage indicating God having two wives, one named Ahola and the other named Aholibah. It also says that it was the wives who committed adultery, not God who claimed to be married to both of them.

  4. Alicia August 2, 2017 at 3:25 am #

    I am a recent convert to Christianity, but didn’t God actually create two women for Adam? First was Lilith who rebelled and then Eve…who also ended up rebelling? Can someone please fact check me!

    • LifeAfter August 3, 2017 at 7:50 am #

      Hi Alicia – thanks for visiting Life After! Wanted you to know we’re praying for you.
      The Bible doesn’t say anything about a woman named Lilith, or that God gave two women to Adam. Be sure to read Genesis chapters 1-5 which gives us Adam’s history.
      We hope you’re in a good Bible study as well. One of the best things new Christians can do is to sign up for a Bible study at their church so you can begin learning about all the awesome things God has done!
      God bless!
      Michelle
      1 Cor. 1:18

  5. Heather August 15, 2017 at 4:09 pm #

    I would be more inclined to listen to this person if I could understand what I was reading. SO many typos.

  6. Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:20 pm #

    Albert, You are wrong! Trevin only used one passage in Jeremiah, and it is not the strongest passage indicating God having two wives, one named Ahola and the other named Aholibah. It also says that it was the wives who committed adultery, not God who claimed to be married to both of them.

  7. Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:22 pm #

    Albert, You are wrong! Trevin only used one passage in Jeremiah, and it is not the strongest passage indicating God having two wives, one named Ahola and the other named Aholibah. It also says that it was the wives who committed adultery, not God who claimed to be married to both of them.

  8. Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:23 pm #

    Melissa Grimes, can you please give a Scripture reference for the following quote: “His perfect plan for marriage was always one man and one woman. ”

    Thanks

  9. Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:24 pm #

    Melissa Grimes It is not enough to say that God didn’t want more than one wife for Adam, in order to prove that God doesn’t want any man to have more than one wife.

  10. Daniel DeLuca November 13, 2017 at 4:28 pm #

    Melissa Grimes You make an unsupported assertion when you say the following: “deceived by Satan as to enter into relationships that go against His will.” As you hold on to the word of God, be sure not to add anything to it, to confirm your bias. Mormonism is wrong to claim that polygyny is required, but Christians are equally wrong to claim that polygyny is condemned.

  11. Melissa Grimes November 15, 2017 at 3:26 pm #

    Daniel DeLuca,

    I’m going to sum up my response to your comments in one.

    God’s design for marriage is scattered all over the bible, there isn’t just one verse that lets us know God’s design for marriage is one man and one woman. I encourage you to do some study on what God has to say about marriage in His word, and what it represents. It’s perfect because it’s His plan for marriage.
    Ephesians 5:31 “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” It’s would be impossible for the couple to remain “one flesh” if there are other women involved. The man would essentially be ripped apart from the woman, and they would no longer be “one flesh”. – Melissa Grimes

    • Daniel DeLuca January 12, 2018 at 5:53 pm #

      Melissa Grimes Thank you for your response. I don’t agree with your assertion that it would be impossible for a couple to remain “one flesh” if there are other women to whom the man is married to. If you were talking about serial monogamy, that would be correct; the man would essentially be ripped apart from the woman, but polygamy does no such thing! Now polygamy against your first wife’s wishes, is wrong, which is why we have anti-bigamy laws, and that is where a Christian man needs to abide by the law of love. If a wife understands the blessings that often come in plural marriage though, and embraces it, the laws are too broad and should be revised to accommodate those families.

  12. Ines April 20, 2018 at 5:51 am #

    Daniel I’m curious what blessings there are to understand in a plural marriage. Not one polygamist marriage in the Bible is shown in a positive light. They all had some deep problems. The very first marriage in the Bible, instigated by God, sets the tone for the ideal: one man and one woman together for life. The ideal is what a Christian strives for. The patriarchs and other kings the Old Testament did practice polygamy but nowhere does it condone it. It’s merely a description. Polygamy likely was adopted by the Israelites from their Pagan neighbors.

    I talked to my husband about this idea on Christian polygamy and we came down to this: why would a man want another wife? What is the motive? Most likely, and my husband is a man who is open with me about battling sexual temptation-most likely the man who desires another wife is just wanting to fulfill his sensual fleshy desires and try to twist the Bible to justify sexual immorality. ( again this is my husbands opinion and mine as well) . Actually that’s what many in the homosexual community are doing as well.

    On that note I don’t want to say it’s a sin. We all will stand before the Creator of the Universe and to Him we will give an account. That is what we should sift the actions of our lives through.

  13. Truth Seeker September 23, 2018 at 5:45 am #

    Cain and Abel? Seems the first, ideal monogamous marriage did not set such a positive tone after all. Trouble and strife occurs in monogamy and polygamy in scripture. To say otherwise is disingenuous.

    The twelve tribes of Israel were the direct result of polygamy. Guess God has to answer to himself on that one.

    One doesn’t have to enter into polygamy to acknowledge its existance and acceptance by God in scripture. David was simultaneously condemned by God for adultery, while having more than one wife. Taking another man’s wife was his sin. Having more than one for himself was not. God even said he would have given him more, just not from another man.

    Let God be true, and every man a liar.

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